Miami Police Kill Man Eating Another Man’s Face

[Seth]

I got my 12 gauge and a revolver which can hold .410 shotty shells (The Judge). Hehe, no zombies will be getting to me tonight.

[ButtNutt]

Anyways, I was planning on a vacay to Miami Florida this summer. Needless to say, im pooring hot sauce all over my face. Try eating that you face-feasting cocksuckers!

[abacabb]

Yo the judge is a mean mama jamma. But bath salt zombies rejuvenate when they bath in their bath salts lol

[doublestaxx]

It's nastylicious, you've been warned.

Spoiler for Faceless Dude:

Not sure who the guy on the left is, probably the attacker. Or the victim.

He's alive in that picture too. You see that little speck of white, that's the one eye he has left looking at the camera.

and yes the guy on the left is the attacker.

[Tashi]

Anyways, I was planning on a vacay to Miami Florida this summer. Needless to say, im pooring hot sauce all over my face. Try eating that you face-feasting cocksuckers!

hot sauce will make it more tasty

I highly recommend for you to vacay in Miami, just make sure its not a holiday. this place gets packed like a theme park, if your planning to have a relaxing stay plan around the crowded dates. Memorial weekend is never good. Labor day id doable, you should just go any random week or weekend rather than a holiday, its always fun and lots of party.

but the streets are literally unwalkable on some holiday weekends.

[Dystopia]

Sounds more like a PCP case to me.

[Socially Inept]

Sounds more like a PCP case to me.

It's the fucking bath salts over here, dude.. those things are bad news.

It happened again a couple of days ago in Louisiana.. not as bad as the one in Miami, but this guy was in his 40's and bit off a large portion of his victims cheek area.. what is going on with these people? What is taking so long for the US government to get the bath salts off of the shelves? Usually they can't wait to get rid of anything that brings us even the slightest amount of enjoyment, but when there is a mystery chemical that is making people freak out and literally start gnawing on human flesh, it is suddenly taking them a long time to get it away from people?

[neveroddoreven]

It happened again a couple of days ago in Louisiana.. not as bad as the one in Miami, but this guy was in his 40's and bit off a large portion of his victims cheek area.. what is going on with these people?

The cheek is the best part of the human to feast upon. At least they're clued up on homosapien delicacy.

[ButtNutt]

Just read an article about the Victim of the Miami attack. I gotta say I now feel bad about makin jokes about it. It seems like hes a real good person. Hes pullen through though. Hes awake and alert, even talking. He only lost 50% of his face opposed to the 75% they first thought. Just an update........

[Illadelphian]

Here is the guys face now, 2 weeks after the incident.

Spoiler for NSFL:

[Ollie]

That's gotta be a shitty way to wake up. "Excuse me, sir? Yes, you were in an accident...." "WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE ATE MY FACE?!"

[Socially Inept]

Here is the guys face now, 2 weeks after the incident.

Spoiler for NSFL:

wow that is pretty intense. What does NSFL mean? I know NSFW, but have never seen NSFL before...


lol @Ollie.. definitely must have been a shitty way to wake up hahhahaa

[Illadelphian]

Haha Ollie that would be the worst thing ever. I hope he gets some nice doctors to do charity work on him to try and fix his face as much as possible.

@Socially Inept NSFL means not safe for life.

[Seth]

What does NDTITL mean?

[Ewok]

What does NDTITL mean?

No
Dicks
Till
I
Titty
Lick?

[Penguin2]

No
Dicks
Till
I
Titty
Lick?

Seems legit...

[Dystopia]

They did a decent job for what the first pic showed

got any eyes anyone care to donate?

[Illadelphian]

His one eye might be ok too, they covered it temporarily I think because his eyelids are gone or something.

[girl]

Well it looks like its coming guys. Get your guns.

http://gawker.com/5914059/grab-your-...lly-be-upon-us

5/29/12
Grab Your Boomstick: The Zombie Apocalypse May Actually Be Upon Us
Neetzan Zimmerman

By now we've all seen the awful, awful story about the Florida man who was shot to death by police for refusing to stop chewing on another man's face.

We joked around about it being the canary in the mine shaft of an impending zombie apocalypse. But as Tumblr blogger "I Hope Rick Santorum" helpfully points out in an appropriately viral post, this latest incident is not so much a warning shot as it is another in a disconcertingly intensifying stream of zombie-invoking headlines — all from the past two weeks, and all from the Sunshine State.

It all started on 5/16 with an ominous story about a "mysterious rash" at McArthur High School in Hollywood that launched a HazMat investigation. Twleve students and two teachers were treated and released. The source of the rash remains unknown.

Flashfoward two days: HazMat crews were called in to Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International Airport to determine the source of an "unknown chemical" that sent five people to the hospital. Theories abound, but an exact cause was not confirmed.

On 5/20, the first real sign of trouble: 41-year-old Dr. Zachary Bird, was arrested by the Florida Highway Patrol near Orlando and charged with felony battery charges for spitting blood in a patrolman's face. He was also "extremely agitated and enraged," and repeatedly banged his head on the patrol car's plexiglass partition "until he bled."

A few days later, another mystery rash was reported at yet another Broward County school. A HazMat team was once again called in to investigate, and once again left without any concrete answers.

The following day, a "disoriented" Canadian man was arrested aboard an American Airlines plane after he inexpicably attempted to rush the cockpit. The plane had just landed in Miami.

On Saturday, an unidentified homeless man had some 80% of his face bitten off by 31-year-old Rudy Eugene.

And here's the bad news: Whatever's happening in Florida appears to be spreading. The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign tweeted the following the following warning to its students last night: "Hazardous materials released at Institute for Genomic Biology. Escape area if safe to do so. Otherwise seek shelter."

And in Hackensack, New Jersey, today, a man was rushed to the hospital after he reportedly cut out his own intestines and threw them at police officers.

Forget Facebook Stock: Invest in a good bunker.

[GimmeFiction]

So this is what the Mayans foresaw.

[bballerinri2]

ATTENTION UPDATE!

The results came back for his tox-screen and he only had cannabis in him, no bath salts or other substanes... what. The. Fuck. Must have just been mentally ill not all hyped up on something.

[ddb421]

ATTENTION UPDATE!

The results came back for his tox-screen and he only had cannabis in him, no bath salts or other substanes... what. The. Fuck. Must have just been mentally ill not all hyped up on something.

Bath salts have unknown chemical substances in them.

[bballerinri2]

Bath salts have unknown chemical substances in them.

yeah but usually have meph, mdpv, methylone etc, if there's something in your body the corner will know it (maybe not exactly know the chemical but know there's something in it that shouldn't be there)

[Ewok]

haha thats crazy dude. i smoke hella weed I've never aten a dudes face off. Maybe if i get very hungry i might chew on your guys faces.

[abacabb]

Lmfao probably dude... the asteroid collision will probably come after everyone has been zombified...

Speaking of zombies has anyone seen Serpent in the Rainbow?

[twistedhatter13]

That's a bad ass movie