Need some help

[Zak2010]

I'm not as bad off as some people, but I feel like I need to make a change in my life. The past few years I've been dealing with an undiagnosed illness, causing me pain, fatigue, numbness, dizziness, hearing loss, and a degree of other symptoms. I discovered hydrocodone after finding it in the medicine cabinet, and I soon realized it did a pretty damn good job at relieving pain. Eventually because it helped my pain so much, this led me to seek out a pain management doctor, and she put on a pretty hefty dose of pain medicine. I had barely any tolerance to pain medicine, but my doctor prescribed me a Fentanyl Patch 12mcg/hr and Norco to be used with break through pain (up to 4 times a day). Eventually I discovered that it felt pretty damn good to take a "little more" than prescribed. Without me even knowing or thinking much of anything, I began abusing pain medicine on a daily basis.

It's now been two years since I've been on pain medicine, and I've only used it legitimately for 6 months. The other year and a half i've been getting high once a day.

The issue now is that I worry about the longterm side effects of getting high nearly everyday. It can't possible be healthy for your brain, and I don't need anymore problems in my life. I also need to veer away from self-medicating, and I need to find another approach to dealing with stress and emotions.

I really want to talk this out with someone, but I don't know who to turn to. I'm honestly afraid that if I come clean with anyone that I'll be red flagged as a drug addict or drug seeker and that I'll never be able to get medicine that I need (Benzo's, Stimulants, etc) I don't have any desire to get off norco because I do have pain. I just want to quit abusing it or atleast start abusing it less/not depending on it or looking forward to getting high.

If I talked with a therapist, will my pain doctor figure out i'm having issues with abuse and cut off my medication?

Where can I go that'd be anonymous? I definitely need to talk this out with someone....

[Anonymous]

A therapist is required by law to keep anything you say confidential unless you explicitly indicate that you intend on hurting yourself or others. There is nothing suspicious about seeing a therapist, many people do so and you are in no position to have to explain it to anyone. If you truly are having trouble taking this medication without abusing it on a daily basis, you might want to reflect on whether or not it would even be possible to go back to using it legitimately. Moderating drug abuse when control seems to be slipping is pretty damn hard, and unfortunately therapists often can't help us do so. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't see one, you might get some great advice.

[Zak2010]

If I talk to a therapist about abusing medication, is it possible that other doctors I see can find this out? I want to keep this between me and a therapist so that it doesn't effect my ability to get medication in the future. I'm worried that if I tell a therapist that I've abused medicine, it'll be in records that doctors can easily pull up if they look for it and that they'll say "oh well this kid has a history of drug abuse, so i'm never gonna prescribe blabla" I want to avoid this from happening

I basically want to get help without giving myself a history of drug abuse to the medical community

[dankstarR]

If I talk to a therapist about abusing medication, is it possible that other doctors I see can find this out? I want to keep this between me and a therapist so that it doesn't effect my ability to get medication in the future. I'm worried that if I tell a therapist that I've abused medicine, it'll be in records that doctors can easily pull up if they look for it and that they'll say "oh well this kid has a history of drug abuse, so i'm never gonna prescribe blabla" I want to avoid this from happening

I basically want to get help without giving myself a history of drug abuse to the medical community

Like anonymous just said, your shrink can't say anything to anyone about what you tell them unless it's about hurting yourself or others. That's really like the only thing they can talk about. That's the point of going to a shrink, it's a lot easier to talk to someone about your problems who you don't know, won't judge, and keeps it to themselves.

Good luck with everything man

[Socially Inept]

If I talk to a therapist about abusing medication, is it possible that other doctors I see can find this out?

A therapist is required by law to keep anything you say confidential unless you explicitly indicate that you intend on hurting yourself or others.

the answer is no. A therapist cannot disclose anything you tell them, unless (like anon said) you tell them you intend on doing bodily harm to yourself or someone else. You could walk into the shrinks office and tell them you are an opiate addict who doctor shops several times daily just to get your fix and they wouldn't be able to do a thing about it. Don't be afraid to talk to someone. Admitting you have a problem and knowing you want to do something about it is the first step in changing things.. Do you still see the PM doctor? If so, maybe you could talk to them and tell them your concerns about the long term effects of the medicine and let them know you want to start gradually cutting back on the amount of pain meds you use.. Having a doctor help you taper down to a dose you're more comfortable with is the easiest way to go IMO. A lot of people can do it themselves (I'm not one of them), but for people who can't and have the option of doing it "the right way" under the supervision of a doctor, I'm sure it is much easier.. Just a suggestion

[Zak2010]

the answer is no. A therapist cannot disclose anything you tell them, unless (like anon said) you tell them you intend on doing bodily harm to yourself or someone else. You could walk into the shrinks office and tell them you are an opiate addict who doctor shops several times daily just to get your fix and they wouldn't be able to do a thing about it. Don't be afraid to talk to someone. Admitting you have a problem and knowing you want to do something about it is the first step in changing things.. Do you still see the PM doctor? If so, maybe you could talk to them and tell them your concerns about the long term effects of the medicine and let them know you want to start gradually cutting back on the amount of pain meds you use.. Having a doctor help you taper down to a dose you're more comfortable with is the easiest way to go IMO. A lot of people can do it themselves (I'm not one of them), but for people who can't and have the option of doing it "the right way" under the supervision of a doctor, I'm sure it is much easier.. Just a suggestion

When I went to an infectious disease doctor last tuesday, he pulled up some records that said I had been diagnosed with depression and he asked me about it. If therapists/psychiatrists aren't suppose to disclose information, how did he get this info? That's why i'm worried that the shit I tell doctors isn't so "private"

[jesusfish]

When I went to an infectious disease doctor last tuesday, he pulled up some records that said I had been diagnosed with depression and he asked me about it. If therapists/psychiatrists aren't suppose to disclose information, how did he get this info? That's why i'm worried that the shit I tell doctors isn't so "private"

Medical information is private to those outside of the medical field. Legally and ethically one is not supposed to spy on or share patient information with others. Some areas have more advanced medical networks than others, where any time you visit a doctor everything is logged, but even in more paper-based medical communities pertinent information is shared between various doctors, insurance companies, and medical facilities. If you live in the US you signed a paper saying you understood this. This is about medical information, mind you, so diagnosis and treatment are fair game. What you talk about is completely private provided it isn't causing any harm.

[88Inator]

With Obama Care one way they are trying to save money (right!) is to put all your medical records on file electronically so other doctors can see your history on the spot saving time and repeated medical procedures. If you belong to an HMO and you see a therapist within that HMO, your doctor in that HMO will see your history regardless. If you go outside your HMO and spend out of pocket expenses to see a therapist your issue may stay away from your pain med doctor for now. When I went through treatment in 1980, I was assured that my medical records were confidential. When I went to apply for medical insurance seven years later, of course I didn't tell them I had issues with drugs. My application for medical insurance was denied because I falsified my application by not admitting I was an addict. How did they find out? Do you think I would have been able to get coverage if I told the truth? Why would I want to tell anyone that I had issues with drugs anyway?

Maybe you need to try a Narcotics Anonymous meeting. Find someone who has a similar story with some time and talk it out with them (I'm not suggesting you get clean). Maybe that will help. It's guaranteed if you keep using amounts that get you loaded instead of just managing the pain, eventually your resistance is going to get so high that they will have no other choice than to bring you down off of them. My ex-wife has been on Norco for over 30 years. They give her just enough to keep the pain down with no euphoria because she is habituated to them. The pain stays away, but with no warm fuzzies. If she takes to much she has to do without until she gets to the doctor again. Not a pretty sight when she falls about four days short of needing more meds, know what I mean?

The pain med by itself you don't have to worry about so much physically. What is dangerous about pain meds is the Tylenol they put with it. Trust me, your liver will go before anything else. I hear that they are now, or are getting really close to prescribing pain meds without the Tylenol because research is showing severe damage to the liver due to Tylenol toxicity. Ask and see if you can get some meds without the Tylenol. Your pain is serious and to live with that pain without medication is as dysfunctional as using to much pain medication could ever be. Remember, your medication is part of your daily process. I would at least start by not over medicating and see if you can get to the point where you have no pain, but you are not using the medication to get high. You are only two years into this process, don't wait to do something about it ten years down the road. It will only be harder. I wish you the best Zak2010, I know you can do it.

[JimBurke]

I've seen many doctors and none of them seemed to know what or even cared what the other doc did. I won't say no for sure, but in the years of my abuse the right hand did not know what the left hand was doing. Hope it helps.