Probation

[Blaze1]

So I'm currently on felony probation. I've been smoking quite a bit of weed recently and dreading them calling me in for a drug test. So they called me yesterday, but instead of setting up a date for me to come in, they told me they would be setting me up on a monthly mail in system. So my question to all you out there who have experience with probation is what this means for me. From the people I've talked to, the mail in system seems much more lax, but I haven't actually talked to anybody since getting the news(yesterday).

So basically what I'm looking for is what should I expect. I know no one can give a definite answer, but if anyone has been in a similar situation, I'm all ears.

[ThePredator]

It means quit smoking while you are at risk of going to jail. You may be on the mail system when they suddenly call you in for an in person test. It is *not* worth the risk of jail just to get high.

[dankstarR]

I have no idea what mail in system is. But, I would get clean, and try a month or two out and see what the fuck there routine is with it. And after you figure it out, you could start smoking or whatever you do, if you want to risk it. The thing with probation is they can test you once a week for 6 months than out of no where test you a day after you already took the test. It's like Russian roulette.

[thermal]

If you have $150 extra, say fuck quitting and light up a fattie. I went to my last piss test high, and I've yet to fail (holding strong with 3 negatives). Get a whizzinator, and you'll pass every time with no need to quit. Or get a few friends to go in on one. I'm sharing mine with 2 other people, so we split the cost

[CJizzle7]

well it seems like everyone knows about the common methods of passing piss tests.. drinking water, working out, flush kits, getting fake piss but my friends have recently showed me probably the most brilliant way to pass a piss test
BLEACH
before having a piss test you just soak your thumb in bleach and pee on your thumb or you can get an empty visine bottle and fill it with bleach then drop a few drops into your cup of piss
i have had 3 friends try this trick over a half a dozen times and it prevented them from going back to jail and im going to test it out this week at my probation meeting if they decide to piss test me

[thermal]

Seriously dude, gtfo. That is complete bullshit. People like you are the reason people really smoke embalming fluid on their bud. You're not supposed to, but people just can't understand its a slang term for pcp. If he listens to you, he's going to fail probation

[Pinkfloyd]

well it seems like everyone knows about the common methods of passing piss tests.. drinking water, working out, flush kits, getting fake piss but my friends have recently showed me probably the most brilliant way to pass a piss test
BLEACH
before having a piss test you just soak your thumb in bleach and pee on your thumb or you can get an empty visine bottle and fill it with bleach then drop a few drops into your cup of piss
i have had 3 friends try this trick over a half a dozen times and it prevented them from going back to jail and im going to test it out this week at my probation meeting if they decide to piss test me

Source? Legit source. And by the way they make you wash your hands before a piss test. To the OP. Just quit smoking. I cannot stress it enough how much better off i was when i finally quit smoking when i was on probation. The thing is that they can tell you any time they want that you have to go for a drug test. If you fail to do so in the next 24 hours, then you have a court date. Not worth it man, not at all.

[Ollie]

http://www.erowid.org/psychoactives/...ng_faq.shtml#6

8.1.1 Bleach (powdered): Chlorinated bleach will test negative, and it's the best household additive. In an emergency, Jeff Nightbyrd recommends adding unscented bleach crystals to a diluted sample. It's recommended to grind the powdered bleach to a finer grain. 1/4 teaspoon is recommended for a 60cc sample. For liquid bleach, add six to ten drops. Bleach will throw the pH outside the normal body range; so it may be apparent that the sample was tampered with. Some bleaches foam or leave residue, so experiment with different brands before selecting which to use.

Emphasis mine. So if your probation officer is using something that tests whether or not a sample has been tampered with, you're fucked. If he's using a Walmart over-the-counter kit, this may be a solution.

Personally, its not a solution I'd ever be comfortable with. Also, given the description, I don't think pissing on a soaked thumb will do much good unless its still dripping when you get in to do your business.

[dnbmember]

If you have $150 extra, say fuck quitting and light up a fattie. I went to my last piss test high, and I've yet to fail (holding strong with 3 negatives). Get a whizzinator, and you'll pass every time with no need to quit. Or get a few friends to go in on one. I'm sharing mine with 2 other people, so we split the cost

I'd be careful with suggesting that. I know in my city all the POs are onto that and make you piss with the door open.

[bROW]

Everytime I had to piss I had to lift my shirt up and then piss with them watching you. THey had mirrors around the toilet to make sure you didnt try anything, it was pretty sweet.

[Dystopia]

how is someone watching you piss pretty sweet.

[djwolford]

I always hated piss tests when I was on color code because of that. I have an amazingly hard time taking a pee when someone is eyeballing my goods the whole time. There's nothing sweet about it.

[thermal]

I'd be careful with suggesting that. I know in my city all the POs are onto that and make you piss with the door open.

I've heard with the marines they physically hold your dick while you pee. Idk, my probation was go to dr, get script to bring to labcorp, pick up results from dr, take to court before a certain date.

[masterofpuppets222]

how is someone watching you piss pretty sweet.

I do not understand that sentiment either lol.

[Dystopia]

I've heard with the marines they physically hold your dick while you pee. Idk, my probation was go to dr, get script to bring to labcorp, pick up results from dr, take to court before a certain date.

Lol, Wires just said he joined the Marines, hahah, hope he enjoys someone holding his dick while he pees.

[BitchIMightBe]

Don't smoke bud while you're on probation maybe?

[djwolford]

Don't smoke bud while you're on probation maybe?

Ding ding ding!

I can't say much because I stayed effed up as a football bat while I was on. That's the most logical choice though.

[bROW]

how is someone watching you piss pretty sweet.

Sarcasm. I hated trying to piss with some random dude watching my junk in 3 different angles because they had mirrors all around the toilet.

[Phredrick]

Ollie you should make a sticky that tells these ignorant people not to smoke weed while on probation or while waiting to be drug tested. I have a hard time not being rude as fuck to people asking what to do in that situation.

[Marik Keyes]

It means quit smoking while you are at risk of going to jail. You may be on the mail system when they suddenly call you in for an in person test. It is *not* worth the risk of jail just to get high.

Consequences are never worth the risk.
Punishment never fits crime, if it did that would constitute a fundamental flaw in the semi-quantum reality, universally known as earth.