I need help potty training a 2 year old boy...

[Dodilicious]

Well tonight I decided to really really start potty training my fiance's son. She always gets upset with messy nasty diapers, and never really makes the effort to potty train him. Which isn't fair to him, he just doesn't know better. We've tried some nights, but we haven't been consistent. So tonight, I made him sit there on the toilet with his potty training lid thingy you put on it, and he sat there for maybe an hour. I kept giving him juice and stuff so he would have to go. After an hour I let him off, I told him, "You make ewww's in the potty, Liam. Tell me when you go ewww." He knows "eww" and "poopoo" as going to the bathroom... I think. Anyways I take him off the toilet, and don't put a diaper on him, as an experiment, thinking he'd be confused and not just pee or poop everywhere. But literally 10 seconds after I take him off the toilet he pee's on the floor. So I spanked him, told him no, and put him back on the toilet.
Now he's off the toilet again after about another hour of sitting there, without a diaper.. and hopefully he won't pee or shit on the floor. I fucking hope. And it's alright so far, as it's been maybe 10 minutes this time instead of 10 seconds, and no messes yet. So, do any of you have any past experiences you can share? Or any links to information on the internet as to how I should go about this would be appreciated.

[StinkyBambinosAndcheese]

You don't potty train a 2yo. The only reason to start seriously training that young is b/c the parent is tired of wiping ass (which you will still do btw. it takes a while to be able to clean yourself properly). Selfish and lazy. I know b/c I was that parent. You push and so will they. They may do okay for a bit but will revert if too soon. Spanking and shaming does NOT work. It only makes it worse. Learn the signs of having to go and put them on the pot, other than that... let them see you go, make their potty accessible and BE PATIENT. You have to make it fun. You have to make it a game. Do a silly dance. Do not punish them, only reward. Potty training is a pain in the ass. I went thru it with my kid and helped all my friends' kids. Children really connect with me and I them. I know what I am talking about. Pm me. It is a long, arduous process. You need a support system more than anything. They will eventually come around. Potty training is personal. Remember, this isn't about you, but you are turning it into that. This is your frustration, not theirs. It is between the ages of 3 and 5 before kids are fully potty trained. Even then they may still have occasional accidents. THAT IS NORMAL. I know many people (including myself) pushed at 2, but don't. Please don't feel the need to keep up with the Joneses. Respect your child.

[FloydWonder]

Spanking and shaming does NOT work.

Fuck that mainstream bullshit, Spanking always worked for me. Im the man I am today because I was ass-smacked as a child, not beat, just spanked and yelled at lol.

[Ranga]

Lol liams a cool name your fiance has good taste.

[Ollie]

Fuck that mainstream bullshit, Spanking always worked for me. Im the man I am today because I was ass-smacked as a child, not beat, just spanked and yelled at lol.
Even were that more effective for children generally (it's not, and there's a wealth of research to refute your singular experience), it is particularly ineffective at that age because of a lack of understanding of consequences.

[StinkyBambinosAndcheese]

Fuck that mainstream bullshit, Spanking always worked for me. Im the man I am today because I was ass-smacked as a child, not beat, just spanked and yelled at lol.

Now that mine is older I will sometimes give a swat or a spank and I definitely get loud, but only putting a little bass in my voice is what works the most. Generally speaking when parents lash out like that it is an adult temper tantrum.

[startrack]

Seems a little strange to be asking about toilet training on a drug use board?? Perhaps visit some parenting sites?

[StinkyBambinosAndcheese]

It is a really random question for a drugs message board. He was probably high and it was convenient. Hahaha! Drug users have kids too.

[Socially Inept]

My little boy was potty trained 2 months after he turned 2. I fucking hated changing diapers.. it gets pretty gross when your kids start eating grown up food and then having grown up poops that are smeared all over their butts.. I think it is perfectly fine to want to potty train him, but if he is 100% not interested or doesn't seem to get it, you probably should wait a while.

Here's what I did with both of my kids- make sure you let him watch you pee, like every time you go make a big deal about it and act really excited to be going, make him think going to the bathroom like a "big boy" is a really big fucking deal.. Like, be completely overly dramatic about it.. also if you have any really close male friends or family members that you feel comfortable with, let him watch them too.. With my son, this was really important.. he's not going to know or understand what to do just by you telling him, he needs a visual aid and obviously his mom isn't going to be able to help in that department. The potty chair thing that sits on the toilet is the same thing I used for both of my kids and I think they work WAY better than an actual little potty for kids, but only use it when he has to poop.. if he has to pee let him try to stand up and go (gonna have to get a stool of course). My son absolutely would not sit down to pee after watching his Dad stand up and go. You can also toss some cereal in the toilet and let him aim at them and push them around, my kid fucking loved doing this. So after he pees in the toilet like a big boy, make a huge deal about it..., like have a little party for him and buy him a cake or something... act like it is the most amazing thing in the whole world and that you are so proud of him you just might pee in your own pants (haha). Then go out and buy a pair of tiny little boy underwear and instead of just letting him run around naked, put the underwear on him and tell him not to get them wet. If he gets them wet do whatever you have to do to let him know he messed up (I definitely gave my kids a little swat) and then put a new pair on him. I potty trained both my kids using this method and after about 2 days they literally would not put a diaper back on, they wanted to stay dry and were super proud to show off their big kid undies. Of course you will have to keep him in a pull up at night for quite a while, even if they have zero accidents during the day, you can't expect a kid to wake up in the middle of the night to go on his own. If he's like my kids he will hate wearing the pull up after he starts wearing underwear and might event take it off when you go to sleep.. if you have this problem, set an alarm and wake up a couple of times in the middle of the night and take him to pee then right back to bed.

Basically the main things are staying consistent, once you get started don't stop- and really making it seem like a fun, awesome thing to go pee like an adult. Buy the underwear before hand and even go as far as to wrap them up like a present so they get really excited when they see them (what kid doesn't like presents?) and they want to keep them dry.. This is a weird thing to be talking about on DnB, but seriously feel free to PM me if you want or need any more advice in this department. I know everyone here knows me for being this huge drug addict, but IRL I am also a stay at home mom and have two brilliant, extremely well behaved kids (they take after their Dad lol).. Potty training seems to be one of the most nerve racking things for some parents, but for me it was totally simple and something my kids actually seemed to enjoy doing. Kids become way more fun after they stop peeing and pooping all over themselves.. mine did anyway ;)

[Anonymous]

You don't potty train a 2yo. The only reason to start seriously training that young is b/c the parent is tired of wiping ass (which you will still do btw. it takes a while to be able to clean yourself properly).

This is the same reason anyone is ever potty trained, so no one else has to do it for them. All of my nieces and nephews were potty trained by the time they were three. I think it's pretty normal, and it's a great way to advocate self-sufficiency.

To treat children as if they won't respond to punishment is simply ridiculous. While I do think it's strange to spank a two year old, teaching children a sense of consequences from an early age is vital. It is the nature of human existence to respond negatively to negative stimuli, and positive to positive stimuli. If it weren't for this we would still all be rolling around on the floor crying like a newborn. I appreciate all of the scientific evidence but when it comes to development I find it hard to take psychologists' conclusions seriously. Just because someone threw a bunch of chimps in a room with a blanket or surveyed a bunch of parents doesn't mean the biases they used to mold the experiment were proven true.

[Socially Inept]

To treat children as if they won't respond to punishment is simply ridiculous.

I agree with this 100%, and also am a firm believer that if your kid is not at least slightly afraid of you, they are never going to respect you. I have friends that will yell and threaten to spank their kids when they are being jerks, but they never follow through with it. It's really annoying to know the kid has to be thinking "Yeah fucking right, you're not going to spank me and I know it.." If my kids are ever acting up, I seriously have to just give them "the look" and they will calm down right away.. I don't threaten to spank them, I just do it... I've never felt the need to take the verbal warnings to the point that I am screaming "I'm going to come over there and spank you!" if it goes that far, I'm just going to walk over and give them a quick swat.. always on the ass and always with the amount of force you would use with a small kid. There is a huge difference between getting a quick spanking on the butt and actually beating a child. I was spanked as a kid and I was also scared shitless of my parents. This definitely made me a better child and also gave me more respect for my parents, and I'm sure anyone who got spanked as a kid would say the exact same thing.. Kids respond extremely well to punishment as long as it is done the correct way. Kids will act like little obnoxious assholes if they know the worst thing that is going to happen to them is that they are going to be sat alone in a room for a few minutes. It's funny that I believe very much in spanking kids, but I think a "time out" is one of the most ridiculous ways to punish a child and also a very lazy way to parent. Your kid is acting up and being annoying and instead of insisting they stop and behave themselves, instead you make them sit alone in their room? How is that helping anything? It's not.. it's giving you a break from your kid and your duties as a parent, IMO.


The crazy things we discuss on this forum... lol.

[StinkyBambinosAndcheese]

I know the reasoning behind potty training. My point is parents often push their children sooner b/c of their own selfish needs. Which in turns leads to more accidents and more frustrations. I think 2 is a great age to introduce them to potty training, but to push them even punish them? No. Yes, it is important to stay consistent. Children need routine and structure. But your children shouldn't fear you, they should fear the consequence. And there is nothing wrong with taking a time out from your child. Sometimes you need a breather. Fear does not equate respect. What happens when those children grow up and you can't spank them anymore? Why hit my child when I can get my point across in a non violent manner? Sometimes a swat is warranted, but only in extreme instances. Spanking as punishment teaches them it is okay to hit when someone does or says something they don't like. It is degrading.

[StinkyBambinosAndcheese]

This isn't a thread about discipline. It's about potty training. Get some undies, pull ups and patience. Shit happens. Limit fluid intake before bed, learn the signs and make it a game. Do a dance, sing a song, and have a party. It's not rocket science. Just remember every normal person eventually gets it and he will too. Pushing too soon can sometimes cause them to revert. Fact. So go with the flow.

[Dodilicious]

Well, I've been going easy with him since I posted this, talked to some of you in IRC, and showed you naked pictures of my fiance and I. Liam has very few signs of when he needs to go to the bathroom, never shows any when he pees and squats down when he has to take a dump. But even that sign is misleading because sometimes he will squat down to do something else. But I've made the potty available to him and trying not to force him, but he isn't interested.
I read some things about the sooner you potty train the better for the kid, and fewer accidents they'll have. Also read about how using pull-ups after diapers is a scam and will only make the training take longer. But anyhow.. we'll see how it goes for now, I appreciate your comments everyone.

[StinkyBambinosAndcheese]

IRC ftw! Ha! The pull ups are for night time. Constantly cleaning pee sheets is gross and time consuming. Especially if you live in an apartment and have to go to laundry mat or someone's house. Eventually the mattress will be ruined and stuff smells like urine. That's another reason you cut fluid intake maybe 2/3 hrs before bed. That helps. Also, I would take him in there every time you go and a bit after he eats and drinks. You'll figure it out.